Flappy Bird
by rottenpotate
Summary: What does everyone's favorite soldier do when he starts playing a new game? Get pissed, of course!


Flappy Bird

**AN: There is no evidence of anyone in AoT/SNK having technology beyond the 3DMG, but I thought it would be hilarious to write about Levi getting pissed at a video game. Enjoy! x**

Chapter 1: One Man, One Bird

Captain Levi was walking across the training grounds, observing the new recruits as they trained with the 3D maneuver gear. He sighed. It would only be a matter of time before most of the faces he was looking at would no longer be there.

Death. The thing he hated most.

Levi's thoughts were interrupted by laughter from across the field. His head turned, and he saw two of the four of his Special Operations Squad huddled together over an electronic device.

Levi walked over to them. Petra and Oluo looked up in the middle of their laughter and instantly stopped as they saw their captain.

"Captain Levi, " Oluo and Petra soluted.

"What are you both doing?" asked Levi, sounding annoyed.

"We're playing this game! It's called Flappy Bird. Have you ever heard of it?" Petra asked, a small smile on her face.

"No, I haven't. I am a busy man, you see," Levi said slowly.

"Well, I think you should play it. I would like to see you beat my score! I got 72, first try!" Oluo boasted.

"You're seriously boasting about getting a high score on a stupid video game?" Levi sneered.

"Hey! It's not as easy as it looks!" Oluo replied. "I suggest you give it a try!"

"Fine. Give me that." Levi took the device out of Petra's hands, and pressed "Start." The screen told him to tap, so he started tapping. A pixely bird was floating through the air, and some green gapped pipes started to move toward the bird. Levi hit the pipe, resulting in a score of zero.

Petra and Oluo started laughing their heads off. Levi looked up, eyes flashing menacingly.

"What's so funny?" Levi asked.

"Oh, Captain! You really are awful at that game!" Petra cried.

"Yeah! Humanity's greatest soldier! I think not!" agreed Oluo, tears in his eyes.

"That was only my first try. I bet I could get better at it..." Levi said to himself.

* * *

THREE DAYS LATER

"Soldiers! Assemble in an orderly fashion in front of me!" Erwin commanded, his voice loud and authoritative.

All of new and old Survey Corps members lined up in front of their commander, all except one.

"Where's Levi?" Erwin demanded.

Everyone looked at each other. No one had really noticed his disappearance.

"Um... commander?" Petra asked uncertainly. Oluo stood beside her, looking smug.

"Yes?" replied the commander.

"I think I might know what happened to him..." she hesitated.

* * *

"Fuck!" Erwin, Oluo, and Petra heard a small expletive as they walked to Levi's room.

The three stopped outside. It was unlocked. They slowly walked in.

There he was. Captain Levi, sitting at his desk with a small electronic device. Eyes big as biscuits, furiously tapping away at the touch screen. His room was covered in dust. This was something very uncharacteristic of Levi.

"Damn it!" Levi yelled as he lost yet another game of Flappy Bird. He ran his hands through his hair. Erwin had never seen Levi look so flustered.

"Levi! What is the meaning of this?" Erwin questioned.

"This fucking game! Oluo is seriously the biggest piece of shit I have ever met. He just had to goad me into playing this game. I can't get past the fucking third pipe! Damn it!" Levi's face was grim.

Erwin had no idea what to say. Humanity's greatest soldier was losing his calm dimeanor over a video game. Sure, fight man-eating titans. No problem. A video game, on the other hand...

It looked like Levi had started another game. He started tapping away at the screen. Oluo just snickered arrogantly. Petra sighed.

"Hey Levi, how's the game going?" Oluo's voice was arrogant.

Oluo's words distracted Levi, and it appeared he lost again.

Levi threw the device across the room. It hit the wall and shattered into tiny pieces. He stomped out of the room, and slammed the door.

"FUCK THIS GAME!" Levi screamed.


End file.
